Drought

We find a free table.
Wait. Bide. No waiter comes.
We find menus ourselves.
Peruse. No Waiter comes.
I go to the toilet,
Flick at the hands-free tap.
Flap at this blind Cyclops.
Waggle. No water comes.
We signal we’re ready.
Wait. Bide. No waiter comes.
Sunday night at Prezzo:
We come. We wait. We go.
++Unresponsive sensor.
++Unresponsive servers.

(Prezzo, Brighton Marina)

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Akash, Don’t Ah-Ask

Four guys went to the Akash in Burnham,
but before the final two were seated,
the group was told “You want eight papadum”.
This sharp injunction was thrice repeated.
The four guys had not opened their menus
when they were told “You want four Cobra beer”.
Asking for one tap water, just three booze,
caused a look of derision with a sneer.
They ordered four, but eight papadums came,
with chutney so thin it spilled when rotated.
The flavour of the mains was just as lame,
biryani rice met meat – when plated.
++“You want four guys” to return to Akash?
++Then exhibit good taste and be less brash.

Chutney arc on tablecloth, Akash, Burnham
Chutney arc on tablecloth, Akash, Burnham

(Akash restaurant, Burnham, Bucks)

Winter solstice salutations from William

Best wishes for a healthy, rewarding and joyful astral new year

sny_121221 solstice lunar eclipseMy year past included, on Friday 13-Dec-13 . . .

Little Willie and Luvlady set off
for the Telscombe Cliffs Tavern, there to quaff
a glass of wine in armchairs by the fire,
and reflect on the things they both admire.

“You can’t sit there, that table is reserved,”
cried the server. They knew; they had observed.
“WHEN they arrive,” said Willie, “we’ll change seat.”
“That table is reserved!”   “Yes, BUT we’ll shift tout de suite.”

Luvlady added, “We came for a drink,
and can move two glasses quick as a blink.”
“You can’t sit there,” was the stubborn refrain.
So they left, to never return again.

Little Willie and Luvlady set off
next door to the Badger’s, where they did quaff
glasses of wine in armchairs by the log fire,
reflecting on the things they both admire.

Note: The background of the image of the solstice moon’s eclipse is from NASA’s Picture of the Day where there is an explanation and picture credits.